September 26, 2012


Today has been my first official day home alone.  It has felt kind of strange because I have had so many people around me round the clock since Sept. 6th.  The house seems so quiet.   It just feels odd.  I managed to do 2 loads of laundry…but I know that I will be in “trouble” for that when my mom gets here in a bit and again when Nick finds out.  It is so hard to sit and not do anything when you are used to always being on the go. Even though I have done some laundry, I am not over doing it and I am resting a lot because I want my body to heal and for the swelling to go down.

My mother-in-law, Betty, called me today to chit-chat.  When I was first diagnosed, I think that she had a hard time talking to me because she didn’t know what to say.  It has gotten easier though.  I have taken to calling her sometimes when I am having a bad day because she is stronger and I know that I can cry and not have to worry about upsetting her.  After typing that I have to say that I think that I have heard her trying not to cry on the phone while talking to me.  She has moments where she sounds like she is really choked up.  My father-in-law, Tony took the phone from her the other day and talked to me for the first time since all of this has started.  He had a very close friend who recently went through a cancer diagnosis and chemotherapy.  Dad (Tony) told me that there are going to be days when I am going to be positive and happy.  Then there will be days when I will want to cry.  He said not to hold the tears in, let them come out.  He then said that that there will days when I will be angry and will want to yell and scream.  He again told me not to hold it in because those who love me will forgive me and understand.  Dad said that he was with his friend through every one of those phases and he said that it is normal and for not to try to be superwoman and hold it all in.  He ended the conversation with telling me to stay strong and that I can fight this.  Hearing this come from him meant so much to me.  It showed me that he really cares.

Mom (Betty) has called to check on me several times over the past few weeks .  We had a nice chit-chat this morning with no tears!!!  I wish we were able to go up to PA for the holidays, but Thanksgiving is out of the question for sure due to my chemo schedule.  Nick and I have, however, invited them down here for Thanksgiving.  I don’t know if they will be able to make it thought because Nick’s older brother, Tony, and his wife, Danielle, have a big Thanksgiving dinner planned for the whole family up there.  I will understand if they are unable to make it, but the invitation has been sent.

My neighbors, Beau and Vera, came to visit a couple of days ago and brought me some super nice gifts.  Beau and his mom, Marie, bought a nice big basket with a cloth lining and it was filled with I believe about 10 magazines, 5 DVD movies, and snacks for when I start my chemo!  Each station in the chemo department has a TV and DVD player so this was such a thoughtful and kind gift! Vera made us some yummy homemade apple turnovers.  They were delicious!!!  She also made a seven layer salad that Nick thought was awesome!

I guess I will end this posting now…Nick just called to check on me and my mom called to let me know that she is on her way here to help me get some laundry and some other things done around the house.


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